Life Review

Life Review

Life review refers to the increase in the vividness and consciousness of memories for re-analysis or resolution. It is a fundamental part of the aging process that differs from individual to individual. Life review is a universal process that occurs in response to old age, terminal illness, or near-death experience. Some people go through the process without realizing it. It is a response to the approach of death when individuals recognize they can no longer feel that death is only for other people. A life review brings life-long memories that had faded slightly into sharper focus. Unresolved issues tend to take center stage during this time. This research paper will focus on the life review as pertains to old age by interviewing an older person.

The Interview

I chose my maternal grandmother as the interviewee for this interview. I settled on her because she raised me for a short while during my childhood, and we have remained close ever since. My grandmother also tends to be forthright and doesn’t sugar coat things. She is 66 years old, and her husband, my grandfather, died while she was 40 years old. She has remained single ever since. She still lives on her own in the same street as my family. (Questions will be in bold form and answers in regular font).

So, you have been around awhile, grandma. What would you say is your best memory? That is an easy one for me. It was the day your grandfather admitted he had a crush on me. I had a massive crush on him, but he seemed more interested in another girl, and after a while, I was giving up. Then one evening, he knocked on my door and, while appearing to be on the verge of a nervous breakdown, said he liked me. The rush of warmth I will never forget. His death must have been a massive loss for you. Did it affect the retirement plan you had? Any advice for someone facing retirement as a single person/widow/widower? Yes, it did. We had planned to tour the world a bit, but I had to put that aside because I don’t want to do it alone and because of finances. You have to be ready for the loneliness. It hits you hard, much more than you expect, even if you plan for it. If you lose your partner, you may have to adjust your financial plan for retirement.

You see a lot of chronic illnesses in older people. Like I know you have diabetes. What would you say are the characteristics of aging? Do you think people your age understand chronic illnesses, or is it something that comes with age? For instance, how do you know whether you are just getting old or you are suffering from something? I would say the outstanding characteristic is loss of strength and autonomy. You can’t do physical things as well as you used to. Yes, a lot of older people assume chronic illnesses are part of life. When we grew up, people did not focus on these things so much. My diabetes took a while to diagnose because I thought the symptoms were me getting older. I now do regular checkups because it’s the best way to know. Doctors also don’t help-too many of them are willing to write off symptoms as you just getting along.

Let us remain on health for a bit. Do behavior and psychology while young affect your health in old age? Does personality have an impact on how you experience old age? Yes, all those do affect. When you are old and you have been doing something wrong for you, such as taking alcohol, since you were a teenager, it can be difficult to stop even if your doctor tells you your life depends on it. Some people are just not built for old age because of their psychology and personality. Take men, for example. They can’t handle the loss of autonomy and find it very hard to ask for help because of how they are naturally. When a husband dies, the woman might make it through. But when a wife dies, men usually find it so much harder. You worry. You have to push them. Most will insist they are okay and disappear a few months later if you don’t intervene. I guess it’s easier to be vulnerable with your wife, but men don’t like to be seen as fragile, and old age is about vulnerability. I’m sure you know about ‘baby boomers vs. millennials’; Do people in your generation need to increase productivity? No, it’s called retirement for a reason. Isn’t the cost of taking care of the elderly becoming too much for society? How? In America, you contribute a lot to your retirement.

Okay, let’s finish off with the social aspect. Does socializing help with old age? Yes, 100%. I think loneliness is the biggest killer in old age because it worsens all the things that can kill you. How do you socialize, grandma? I have you guys (family). I’m part of a group of older. We meet three times a week. Card games and all that. Does sex help in old life? We are not going to discuss that. I respect that. Thank you for your time.

Application of Theory

The BioPsychoSocial (BPS) model of healthcare, rather than the biomedical model, was used for this interview. The BPS model takes a holistic approach to health and holds that health is a by-product of physical, social, and mental well-being rather than just the particular disease one suffers from (Walter & McCoyd, 2015). The biological and physical aspects can be seen in the loss of physical strength and diabetes. The social side focused on socialization and loss, while the psychological aspect focused on behavior and personality. I included the economic perspective because it has a significant impact on all aspects of the BPS model for elderly individuals.

My grandmother has suffered several losses and suffers from diabetes, but her wellness indicators are quite positive overall. She has high social participation with her family and with other elders in the community. She still lives on her own and is wholly autonomous. Her quality of life is good, although the loss of her husband had an impact, and she has not had a partner for over 20 years. She has only a mild decline in cognitive function and has no physical disability.

Reflection and Conclusion

This project has been full of surprises and illumination. The most important lesson I have drawn from the interview is that loss is a significant part of old age and that the amount of damage older people undergo is underestimated. There are the typical losses that we all know about and think we understand. Loss of spouses and loved ones and the loss of autonomy are widely known, but a lot of people, including myself, take it as just a normal part of aging (Bartlam & Machin, 2016). We do not see that the death of a loved one is a massive loss, whether you are young or old. It can be worse for older people because they lose people they have known for a very long time. They also tend to bereave many loved ones in a short period.

However, it is the subtler losses that are not easily seen or talked about that I learned from the most. These losses often compound the more significant losses and make old age harder. For instance, my grandmother had to abandon her dream of touring the world after my grandfather died. She has never been outside the United States and wanted to visit Africa and Asia after retiring. When her husband died, her dream also died. That was a loss for her. Yet it was not something she discussed with others or something she got consoled for experiencing. There is also a loss of habits. Good or bad, practices can be a significant part of our lives. The loss is compounded in older people because they may have had some of these habits for the majority of their lives.

Take the example my grandmother used-that of a drinker told to quit for their health. The person may have been drinking since he/she was 18 years old. Being asked to stop at 78 after 60 years must represent a significant loss. The doctor and younger family members may fail to see the loss for what it is. To them, quitting alcohol is a positive step that will benefit the senior person. A habit can be as good, and as familiar as a friend and to the older person and abandoning routines can constitute a significant loss. My grandmother once told me she had to stop eating very sugary things after her diagnosis. The cessation included her home-made cakes, whose recipe has been passed down for generations. She learned it from her grandmother and the experience of her favorite memory of her grandmother. At the time, I did not appreciate the loss for what it was.

I’ve also learned that gender roles and notions of masculinity affect men during old age. My grandmother notes that women are more likely to survive the impact of old and the loss of a spouse than men because of how they are socialized as children. The acknowledgment is an explanation of the efforts to reduce toxic masculinity and gender-based expectations.

We need to do more as a society to understand older human beings. Cultures that revere older people also often fail to see them as proper human beings with dreams and aspirations and see them only as a source of wisdom. Older people need help to tackle the losses they face in life. Sometimes even they do not know that they have suffered a loss.