Does Lust Prejudice from first Impressions Ruin the Characters Chances of Love?

Does Lust Prejudice from first Impressions Ruin the Characters Chances of Love?

Introduction

It is somewhat accepted wisdom that virtually every normal man, whether blessed with economic fortunes or not, at some point in life, must be in search of a woman for a wife. The social configuration in our societies gets made in a way that men who are economically stable or who are, to a greater extent making good fortunes, get preferred as suitable individuals to marry someone’s daughter. Whether, at first, it is love, or not, that is not a carefully thought social, moral discourse. With all fairness, the only valid argument is that every parent will want his or her daughter to be happily married to a man who can guarantee her good life. The tragedy, however, is that societies get skewed in defining how and what ought to be a happy marriage. In this case, in most cultures, happy marriage is mainly described in economic spheres, the innate human heart-the fountains of love get given a wide berth. In this paper, I will present a careful critique of whether lust prejudice from first impressions can potentially ruin the chances of individuals to offer themselves for love and eventually get married.

Ideally, the subject of love and marriage draws mixed reactions when interrogated from different facets of life. It is so because love and marriage got deeply embedded in every society, and even governments have awakened up to this matter and offered legal groundings in conducting weddings. However, in spite of the broad scope that the subject sits on, there are still some gray areas that are mainly conspicuous. These gray areas have not got addressed to satisfaction and need answers from all institutions that are concerned. All marriage institutions have been unable to explain why divorce is happening or why we have aging virgins. We have all witnessed collapsing marriages over all the world, with courts flooded with divorce applications. Most laughably, or annoying, is that even marriages conducted in churches or other religious institutions are failing. One wonders what can constitute a lasting and stable love-marriage, given that institutions that advance love and marriage seem to have phenomenally failed. The only option at hand, which I offer as last resort to save the struggling institution of love and friendship, is that we ought to get back to the drawing board and re-imagine the whole matter. Scholars and thinkers are invited to these deliberations to get any sense of this wanting subject.

For us to get honest and perhaps satisfying convictions, we need to ask ourselves the question: Does lust prejudice from first impressions ruin the characters’ chances of love? The problem is both a moral and a psychological puzzle that needs to get addressed with sobriety. It is an honest question because it invites persons to explore the normative aspects of what constitutes the rightfully accepted social and cultural beliefs in marriage. Every society, whether in civilized hegemonies or not, have set moral standards in love and marriage. There are dos and don’ts that individuals who offer themselves for love and friendship get expected to observe, whether in public or private life (Olivola 2010). It is a psychological schema because it invites intellectual submission to the basic precepts of love and marriage. Psychologists and experts in this matter, exact and inflict their wit on primary issues that are at the center of every individual heart willing to take part in love and marriage. It elevates the normative philosophical intentions of every serious potential lover, may it be a man or a woman, and how they act and react to different circumstances.

In the novel Pride and Prejudice, we get exposed to one of the most cherishing love stories in English literature. The book provides the perfect illustration of the marriages witnessed in everyday life; that love is not a component for marriage (Lau 2017). Undoubtedly, the most significant percentage of all marriages seen in the world today-whether civil, cultural, or religious get founded based on necessity. It is somewhat accepted knowledge that most marriages get based on lust, which gradually fades with time leading to a struggled love-life. From the book Pride and Prejudice, it is clear that some of the characters, such as Elizabeth, misjudge Darcy on the grounds of a poor-person first impression. Notably, Darcy suffers the same fate as he makes prejudice of Elizabeth’s social class, which blinds him for a while as opposed to looking at her virtues. Persons who are in search of their soul mates find themselves in greasy situations by trying to understand and cope with the principle of realism. Primarily, anxieties about our desire to achieve competent social and economic connections interfere and affect love life.

Every person wishes to cling to an individual who is socially connected and economically stable. The innate human mind and the normative intentions of pursuing a lover are overlooked, jeopardizing the ability of persons to live a healthy and flourishing love life. In modern societies, which are characterized by a paradigm shift from the conventional ways, romantic love appears to be a privilege-and people have learned to do without it. Less said love is rare to find, real love-because it ought to be a union of emphatic minds springing from the inner of our hearts. Love is perhaps only available to the intelligent, mature individuals-mainly praised in building and achieving the character you want. Genuine friendship and love for persons should be a force, different from what society views it to be, and a spirited force that is capable of withstanding even the most challenging moments in the lives of partners. Today, however, love appears to be a union in jeopardy, with individuals getting united by materialism.

Reading from a book called Mistakes Were Made, written by Elliot Aronson and Carlos Tavris, one realizes that people resort to self-justification at times when they have uncomfortable feelings with others. From the book’s chapter, cognitive dissonance in marriage, the authors present a fascinating discussion which serves as an eye-opener to all married persons, and more so to those individuals who wish to engage in a relationship. The authors find that conflicts, misunderstandings, angry quarrels, and personal differences are not responsible for death loves, but rather a consequence of self-justification. Both cognitive dissonance and confirmation bias, a psychological principle affect circumstances, writing, and rewriting memories is the most challenging way of getting to know the absolute truth (Oatley 2016). For lovers to grow and build together, they must get ready to do with self-justifications and engage in healthy, meaningful discussions.

Most probably, it is complicated to know the absolute truth of your spouse, and that implies people should never make misinformed judgments about their spouses. However, the sad reality is that people are quick to judge. The situation has led to people making the wrong choices of their spouses, maybe, because they were attracted to them owing to their financial muscles and not a relationship built in the mutual concept of genuine love. The most saddening is that some individuals have lost their would-be best partners because the first impression served to create a chasm as vast as the Great Rift Valley. Although the first impression in love matters, it is perhaps a piece of wise advice to test the waters before making a judgment.

Conclusion

People often hold on to the first impression of their potential partners because they want to merely believe and get convicted that the person is fundamentally well standing. Men are mostly at the receiving end of fooling themselves in thinking and finding that the other individuals want us, and our interests are best in their hearts. Sadly, many times is when the individuals we purport to occupy the sanctums of our hearts are in a business of extracting what we have, and their hearts are miles away from us.

Well, nothing is deterministic, more so these days and the impressions we get first are mainly individuals covering their best face forward. Rarely do these last long; they fade away, and the only thing left is the naked-ugly truth. Taking time to learn and study one another, if that is possible, is the right approach for any serious person who wants to get a healthy and lasting love partner. Time presents a rare chance for everyone to know the truth, either exposing an ugly truth from the person who seemed the best or offering the best from what seemed a disgust. Yes, indeed, first impressions can potentially ruin the chances of individuals getting in love, merely because the persons know each other the least.