The Role of Gender in “To the Lighthouse”

The Role of Gender in “To the Lighthouse”

Gender role is one of the most dominant themes in Virginia Woolf’s To the Lighthouse. In the novel, Woolf writes about the experiences of Mr. Ramsay, Mrs. Ramsay, their eight children, and their guests during a vacation to the family’s summer home located in the Hebrides, Skye (Woolf, 2008). She divides the novel into three primary sections, including The Window, Time Passes, and The Lighthouse. The theme of gender role and relations remains eminent throughout the play as each character develops a distinct standpoint on the theme. For instance, while the novel portrays Mrs. Ramsay as a conventionally ideal woman submissive to her husband and a loving mother to her children, Lily Briscoe, one of the guests, is an independent woman who exhibits less sympathy for men (Woolf, 2008). The novel paints a clear picture of women as submissive beings whose primary duty is to maintain tenderness and massage the male ego.

Male and female genders behave quite differently in an effort to establish a relationship. The concepts of masculinity and femininity are at the center of building relationships among different sexes. For instance, Mrs. Ramsey is highly emotionally accommodative, while Mr. Ramsey is self-confident and aggressive. In her comforting nature, Mrs. Ramsey feels that it is her responsibility to keep the “whole of other sex under her protection” (Woolf, 2008, p.6) caring for them emotionally, cooking for them, and cleaning for them. She does not like it for a second that she feels finer that her husband (39).  As such, it is the role of women to care for and comfort the males.  On the contrary, males are breadwinners, leaders, and decision-makers who seek sympathy, especially from women, yet are less emotional. In their chauvinism, Mr. Transley and Mr. Ramsey are committed to proving what they could do and feel that it is necessary to assert themselves. Although the men in the novel have feelings and emotions about others, they are less likely to reveal or share them.

Additionally, both genders have different roles in attaining unity or disunity. For Mrs. Ramsey, marriage is the primary foundation for achieving unity and happiness. She is convinced that people must marry and have children to be entirely happy. Given her belief, she succeeds in getting Paul to marry Minta, and unsuccessfully tries to convince Lily to get married. She also tries to get her daughters married for “an unmarried woman has missed the best in life” (Woolf, 2008, p.49). To attain unity, especially in marriage, a woman must perceive the man infinitely more important. Mrs. Ramsey felt that “she was not good enough to tie his (her husband) shoe strings” (Woolf, 2008, p.32). On the contrary, Lily Briscoe holds a different perspective. For her, equality is essential for attaining unity. It strikes her when Mr. Transley mentions that “women can’t paint, women can’t write” (Woolf, 2008, p. 48). Although she lives outside gender conventions, she feels sidelined and rejected by the society she lives in.

Further, the novel confirms that gender has everything to do with social order. Social order constitutes how people develop and sustain specific social structures, customs, relations, and particular behaviors. Since time immemorial, society has depended on gender to establish social hierarchies and systems which present male as the dominating gender and a female as a subordinate. Woolf’s novel presents that an ideal woman has two primary roles, to be a wife and a mother. In the two roles, a woman, as exhibited by Mrs. Ramsey, is responsible for supporting her husband, children, and the people around her. Her roles revolve around the household. On the contrary, “men negotiate treaties, rule India, and control finances” (Woolf, 200, p.86). Thus, the involvement of women in any other thing apart from household chores and emotional support might be perceived to be against the social order. The argument explains why Mr. Transley believed that women should not paint or write. Thus, Lily’s conviction to remain single and independent contravenes the conventional social order and obliterates it.

Finally, gender role is essential in aiding the assertion of one’s identity. Since women are perceived to be more emotionally active than men, they have a role in ensuring comfort and helping men reestablish their identity. After the death of Mrs. Ramsey, Mr. Ramsey felt lonely and desperate for sympathy. He begs Lily to provide him with some sympathy as a way to assert his identity (Woolf, 2008). His actions develop the assumption that men might not be in a position to realize the potential of their identities without the sympathy of women. With a lack of sympathy, men’s masculinity is likely to fade. Lily’s experience shows that women assert their identities by becoming independent and realizing the powers they possess.

In conclusion, Virginia Woolf succeeds in presenting the role of gender not only as a complex concept but also as a determinant of social order. The transitioning of the scenes in the novel from The Window to The Lighthouse shows the evolving gender role and social order with the death of Mrs. Ramsey, symbolizing the change. Initially, women are presented as people responsible for caring for their husbands, children, and people around them and nothing more. The Window also exhibits marriage as the only way through which men and women can attain ultimate happiness. The Lighthouse tells a different story with Lily, a single and independent woman, succeeding in life while marriages topple. Thus, it seems that the initial goal of women to maintain tenderness and massage the male ego is evolving with women centering their focus on their success.

Reference

Woolf, V. (2008). To the Lighthouse. New York, NY: Oxford University Press.