“What Are The Perceptions of The grieving Process of The Church Of God in Christ and The Missionary Baptist.”

“What Are The Perceptions of The grieving Process of The Church Of God in Christ and The Missionary Baptist.”

CHAPTER ONE

INTRODUCTION

• Introduction

Death is one of the issues that pose a great challenge to the human race. Many individuals always try to understand, accept it, and rationalize the finality of the event as it affects them. Losing a loved one is never easy on anyone, especially when the affected individual remembers that death is a final and permanent loss that no one can reverse (Feifel, 1977). Once there is a loss of an individual, there’s nothing anybody can do to bring the person back. The pains from the loss and the sorrow resulting from it can never be over no matter the number of years that passes after the burial. Therefore, both individuals and the church must understand the deep sense of loss which death evokes in the bereaved. That way, it’ll be easy to analyze and determine the best grieving process that will help affected individuals to find closure in such a loss. Death, as a necessary end, has never stopped its negative impact, which makes the bereaved miserable all through their lifetime. (Bottum, 2007), however, in this society that is filled with a set of death-denying people, the place of death is quite uncertain (James and Gilliland, 2005). Notwithstanding our mentality towards the subject matter of death, it’s ultimate and irrevocable (Feifel, 1977). Hurt through death is perpetual; besides, the grieving family may not recover totally from such an experience. As a result, it is imperative of the church and other counselors to recognize the bereaved experiences over such occurrence. An absolute understanding of this fact will enable them to acclimatize to the authenticity of death. That alone could help these people in grief to prevent everlasting pain, and discover new means of continuing with their lives (James and Gilliland, 2005). In this ever-changing and complicated world, psychotherapists and other ministers of the gospel are regularly exposed to grief and loss on a daily basis in people’s families, their own life, or in their professions. Neimeyer (2004), opted that every modification undergone by an individual involves loss, according to him, the prerequisite of all losses is change. The demonstrative response to loss is anguish, Hockey, Katz, and Saml, (2001). The struggle to overcome loss is what the subject matter of grieving signifies.

People struggle to adapt to loss as well as rapport with the experience. Muller & Thompson (2003), in defining the passing away of dear ones, stated that it is the most piercing loss an individual could experience. They further stated that it is the most recurrent and thought-provoking matter counselors’ faces in their professional life. Grief, as well as loss, is widespread subjects and fundamental sources of presenting problems during a counseling session. In stating Bonanno, Boerner, & Wortman (2005), approximately 10 to 15 percent of grieving people undergo chronic stress as well as melancholy after some years of loss; only about 2 percentages of the bereaved people suffers from acute stress and downheartedness within a short period of time and their recovery could gradually last for a year or two. A larger sector of the bereaved individuals show shorter grief response and try to endure the physical, mental and psychological health issues of bereavement status. Furthermore, if the condition is complicated, bereaved peoples’ adaptation progression could be lacking, Bonanno et al., (2005). Estimates show that, nearly two-thirds of grieving people are capable of acclimatizing to, and coping with the loss of loved ones, Greally, (1993). The effect of grief caused by the demise of a loved one is highly stressful when one utilizes a social readjustment scale in measuring cumulative stress per a given period, Holmes & Holmes (1970).  Therefore, bereavement cases demands cognitive, emotional, physical, as well as behavioral reactions to those who had lost their loved ones, Parkes (1996). According to Gorman & Southard (1991), people are weak when they are faced with death, even if the death is acceptable as a necessary end. The society at large with numerous religious circles and traditions have acknowledged and accommodated death, yet they find it hard to put up with grieving and loss. According to McNamara (2001), death is the aide-mémoire of the insubstantiality of the human being. The society at large and the bereaved people faces the challenges posed by grieve and loss via death. These challenges shield a wide-spectrum of an individual’s emotional, physical, and spiritual life. The difficult process of grief and loss is undergoing a period of study which aims at uncovering the mysteries behind grief and loss, Stroebe, Hansson, Schut, & Stroebe (2008). Nevertheless, minimal attention has been paid on the aspect of catching grieving persons’ private experiences over grieving and loss. An in-depth evaluation of the circumstance behind grief and loss occurrence is lacking from the various studies undergone in the quest of explaining grief and loss experience, Dillenburger & Keenan (2005). Additionally, Muller & Thomas (2003) observed that majority of the work on bereavement utilized quantitative techniques, Henschen and Heil, 1992; Hogan, Morse, and Tason, (1996). This approach may not categorically express the idea of the bereaved people without a compulsory quantitative frame, Edmonds 3 & Hooker (1992). Most of the experts attending to individuals facing loss of their loved ones are not always prepared for such experience, Ferrini & Ferrini (2008)  many times, the experts notice that they are not ready to handle the psychological, spiritual and physical catastrophes threatening the bereaved people. The rate of rise in artificial and natural calamities in this present time has increased expectation and concern for experts to offer the best response to the bereaved, Gamino & Ritter (2009).  The counselors of the present generation should know that as the world is constantly changing, they should endeavor to get ready to help their clients to handle situations of loss, Ferrini and Ferrini, (2008); Humphrey, (2009); Webb, (2005). This is because; losing a relative could have a great impact on the family mode of operation.  It automatically changes their approach to things, and creates the need to reorganize family members. Appropriate family running which comprises of open interaction, communication of thoughts and feelings with unity in the family enhances amendment of the feeling of loss.

Chapter one is sectionalized into; (a) background, (b) theoretical framework, (c) significance of the work, (d) study purpose, (e) study questions, (f) study limitations, (g) study delimitations, (h) assumptions of the study, with (i) definition of terms.

 

 Study Significance

It is noted that the attitudes of the religious sector towards caring of the people on the verge of death together with the bereaved has changed due to the changing society. The process of death is no longer seen at home, near friends, relatives, or the neighbors. Little time exists for grieving and the bereaved are treated as the object and not the subjects.

Presently, there is stunted literature which could provide a detailed analysis about the mental and emotional health requirement and counseling techniques to the bereaved. Therefore, this study seeks to assist in improving the value of data and facilities to the people grieving. This work will provide greater understanding of grieving people via personal, religious and societal perspectives. Furthermore, this project will examine the argument of Stroebe et al. (2008) & Rando (1988) over the positive impact of religion, cultural rites as well as rituals on assisting grieving people in adjusting and coping with loss. This work will be gotten from bereaved people over their idea of loss, rituals, rite, symbolic communication, and what helped to make their grieving time a little bearable. Other factors which could affect the mourning process will be investigated in this work.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER TWO

Theoretical Concepts

Mourning, loss, and sorrow

In situations of bereavement, people require help to enable them accept and adapt to their challenges. Bereavement signifies a condition of loss via the demise of a specific person or relative, while grief signifies the emotional response to that loss, O’Brien, (2008). The struggle to live with the knowledge of the loss and adapt to the fact that you will not see the person again is grieving, Parkes, (1996). Bottum (2007) held that losses from death are fundamental to human beings with its prevailing effect on their experiences. Through the issue of grief and loss, both the communities and the individuals are motivated to work in reintegrating and restoring unity. The experiences turn out to be the basic reason for peoples’ interaction and alteration Bottum, (2007). The disturbing effect as well as the distress associated with dealing with the issue of loss is a strong inducing influence in the motivation, mental well-being and behavior. However, death categorized under the heading bereavement is that which is of a loved one, not ones death because, people are more conscious of the death of a loved person than their own death.  In accordance with the idea of Bottum, Heidegger (1927), an existential philosopher, did well in positioning death at the middle of philosophy. According to James & Gilliland (2005), there are three major forms of peoples’ response to death. They include acceptance, confrontation, and denial. Death acceptance is the representativeness and perception of death as reality that quickens the act of coping and adapting to grief and loss, Bottum, (2007). Anthropologists in the study of bereavement within diverse societies noticed that sadness pathology is less common in places where their cultural mechanism enables quick acceptance and dealing with loss conditions than in places without such mechanism. Kastenbaum, Doka, Beder Swab, and Farbero’s, (2003) views conveyed through Bottum (2007) and backed up by many scholars stated that sorrowing with no fundamental mechanism and common approach to dealing with the effect is harmful and bad to the physical, emotional and spiritual aspect of human life. Defying as well as denying death is just a kind of reluctances in accepting and helping people having such painful experiences. A death-defying environment, according to Bottum (2007), runs the chance of having cases of unsettled grief or compulsive mourning, because the technique of checking grief is not put into place. Psychiatric issues could arise if the expression of unsettled sorrow or pathological bereavement Bonanno, (2008); Bowlby, (1980); Cassaret, Kutner, and Abraham, (2001); Lang, 2(007); Lazare, (1979); Rando, 1984; Stroebe and  Schut, (1999); Worden, (2002); Zisook, Shuchter, and  Schuchit, (1985).

Aries (1975), thinks that there is modification in the perception of death and grief in the ancient times and now. According to Caillois (1951), the French sociologist, should be forgotten totally.  Ferrini & 5 Ferrini (2008), observes a strong link between anxiety and poor attitude towards grief.

Grief process which lays emphasis on assisting the people in sorrow is no longer focusing on their recovery process of acceptance and adaptation, but aiding them to establishing stable and healthy life. The process, according to Bowlby (1980) requires, restructuring peoples’ self-identity as well as general view after loss might have disorganized them. ,many scholars pointed out the variation existing between length of grieving period with effectiveness to adaptation, Muller & Thompson (2003).  Discussing the experience is imperative to healthy recovery Lindemann, (1944); Worden, 2(002), while some stands against this, Bonanno & Kaltman, (1999); Stroebe, (2002); Wortman and Silver, (1989). Many opted a stage attitude towards grief Kavanaugh, (1972); Kubler-Ross, (1969); Parkes, (1996); while, Attig, (19960; Corr, (1992); Lindemann, (1944); Rando, (1986); Worden, (2002), suggested a task approach towards it.

Religion, rites and rituals

The society and people utilizes rituals and rites with other common practices to tackle death and restore peace in the people and society. Bottum (2007) displayed that Catholics have traditional and religious establishment that utilizes pastoral care, ritual and rites to help bereaved people in grief. However, a need arises which recognizes the mutual effect between the religious and secular society now and in the past. Owing to these facts, the present work will offer a form of understanding of the experiences of grief and loss as it if seen by the bereaved within the setting of the body of Christ.