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 affirmations and critiques

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 affirmations and critiques

Dear Reviewer,

 

Thank you for your helpful affirmations and critiques of the first draft of my ROA. On this final draft, I focused most of my attention on the sentence structure and flow of my paper. As per your advice, I read my paper out loud multiple times to uncover certain sentences that seemed unclear or could be more cohesive.

 

I decided to keep my abstract the same because I felt it covered my review succinctly and efficiently within the appropriate word count. I did not explicitly state the hypothesis, but I feel it is implied when I introduce the article. I did, however, spend some time reorganizing my introduction to avoid a passive tone. I also restructured a few sentences that began with “this study” or “these statistics” to avoid a dull introduction.

 

Within the narrative, I made a few adjustments as per your suggestions. I briefly defined recall bias, and I clarified how self-reported prepregnancy data on birth certificates could fall under recall bias. By restructuring my sentences, I believe I improved the overall flow and clarity of my paragraphs. Specifically, I rephrased the sentence that I began with a number in the first draft. Overall, I made an effort to remove unnecessary words to make my arguments more succinct and clear.

 

I hope you enjoy the final draft of my ROA even more than the first.

 

Sincerely,

 

Amazing Student

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