Arranged Marriages are not Always Negative as Perceived

Arranged Marriages are not Always Negative as Perceived

1. INTRODUCTION
2. What would you do if your parents and family members discretely chose a spouse for you and arranged a marriage? While this seems unfair and even disrespectful, some countries such as India, Nigeria, and Bangladesh live with such phenomena.
3. Some liberal and developed countries such as the United States still experience the same mostly for religious purposes. The practice seems to challenge the notion that marriage should entail two independent people meeting, courting, falling in love, and deciding to get married.
4. Scholarly research however suggests that the success of a marriage is not dependent on whether it was arranged, or based on love. Findings suggest that even couples who find themselves in arranged marriages still fall in love and enjoy their marriage happily.
5. Contrary to the common belief that arranged marriages lead to frustration and unhappiness, many couples seem to overcome the unconventional relationship dynamics of an arranged marriage ending up happy and fulfilled.
6. THE WESTERN PERCEPTION
7. Arranged marriages are typically viewed from a negative perspective by the Western world and those that subscribe to its ideals. Liberalism has created norms, value, and ethical principles that Western society uses to guide and control its social development.

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8. Consequently, religious and other social practices support freedom to interact with and choose whomever one wants to marry (Khurshid 112). The consensus is that arranged marriages are just like forced marriages without the aspect of duress. Most Westerners expect the couples in arranged marriage to be unhappy and even predict a total failure of the marriage.
9. WHY ARRANGED MARRIAGES ARE NOT ALWAYS NEGATIVE
10. Contrary to popular belief, arranged marriages are not similar to forced marriages. The later involves two people forced into a union, which gives little regards for their welfare instead focusing on the marital objectives of the parties involved in arranging it (Tolmie 59).
11. Forced marriages differ from arranged ones in the sense that the couple cannot opt out of the union before or after it has occurred. However, many arranged marriages do allow any of the two parties involved reasonable space to opt out of the union for whatever reason. The marriage is arranged, but not mandatory.
12. Unlike forced marriages where the entire process happens outside of the couples’ control, arranged marriages engage the couple. Usually, the two families meet and begin negotiations in full knowledge of the fact that the spouse-to-be has every right to rescind the offer of marriage for any conceivable reason. She can refuse to get married meaning arranged marriages rely heavily on negotiation rather than duress (Honkala 171). Forced marriages usually ignore the legality of the parties involved often resulting in breach of human rights such as underage pregnancy and child marriages.
13. Another consideration that should help to reduce the ignorance and negativity associated with arranged marriages is that the two families make full consideration of each other’s considerations and welfare. Usually, arranged marriages are organized to unite two families due to social or political reasons that still benefit the couple.
14. Most African and Asian families that engage in arranged marriages are intent on preserving their status quo in terms of social standing, religious integrity, and social ties (Honkala 174). The union considers the welfare of the two families in terms of legacies and socioeconomic security while creating a favorable environment for the couple to unite and thrive.
15. The third consideration that seeks to erode the widespread negativity associated with arranged marriages is their significantly high rate of satisfaction. Unfortunately, many people who subscribe to the narrow perspective of Western marriages based on love think that arranged marriages are chronically unhappy for the couple (Clawson 283). Additionally, the widespread notion that arranged marriages are doomed to fail seems to be inaccurate based on scholastic and social observations. Many people think the spouse leaves early in the arranged marriage because of the lack of intimate knowledge both have for each other.
16. THE ROLE OF LOVE IN MODERN MARRIAGE
17. Interestingly, the level of happiness in a marriage seems to be indirectly related to the circumstances surrounding its occurrence. Studies show that both arranged and love-based marriages enjoy almost similar levels of happiness in marriage.
18. Part of this interesting fact is that happiness in marriage is more about the couple’s mindset within the marriage rather than before it (Alston, et al. 139). Therefore, couples in arranged marriages in India have almost the same level of happiness as Western ones in their conventional-styled marriages.
19. CONCLUSION
20. Western perception related to arranged marriages consider them soft forms of forced marriage where the couple lacks happiness and freedom.
21. However, arranged marriages achieve a remarkable level of success because they differ from forced marriages. The spouse has a right to refuse to get into a marital union if she does not want to.
22. Additionally, these marriages achieve significant levels of happiness based on the over-emphasized role of love in marriage. Marriages do not derive all their happiness from the presence of love at the time of union, rather, due to the mindsets of both parties while in the actual union.
23. Therefore, arranged marriages should not face such negativity any more than love-based ones should.